School & Counseling
The past month has been busy to say the least. That is good and bad when you're in the midst of grieving and healing from a loss. Everyone is back in school and work so Rob and I have been just super busy.
Kaila started High School and is our little Freshman :o) She was so nervous, but it is doing well. She is in 2 honors classes so she has been very busy!!
The boys started Pre-K and are just loving it! I am so thankful because we ended up switching their preschool last minute and adding more time, so we were a little nervous, but it's been so good for them.
I am officially back to work and I am enjoying that "normal" as it keeps me going and my brain busy in the right direction. I was working M/W/F and then working from home Tues/Thurs., but I recently changed that and am now working half days in the office on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The Hubs and I didn't agree at first because I had that flexibility to work from hom, but it was something that I needed to do for myself. I knew that my mind would just not be in the right place and I would just think about not having the baby and was afraid I'd become more depressed. Plus, the boys are in preschool while I'm working so it's not that I am just putting them somewhere while I go to work. So far, it's been working out nicely.
Time is definitely making things easier, but my heart is still just so crushed. I have been seeing a counselor since losing Jaxton and that has been helping a lot. She definitely is helping me go through and deal with my emotions and reassuring me that I am not crazy and my feelings are normal. I am trying to be very aware of how my behavior is and what triggers certain moods/behavior as I really don't want my kids to not enjoy their mom and know that mom is going to make it out ok.
I see her about every week and half to two weeks and when I need. It's actually one of the greatest things that I could have done for myself and my family. I am very grateful for her. And I'm sure the rest of family is too --- I do wish that some days, I could just put her in my pocket so when I'm having a moment, I can just pull her out and she can tell me I'm ok and normal and tell the hubs or whomever is around me at that moment too --- just a reassurance to everyone that I am not crazy! Ha :o)
Kaila started High School and is our little Freshman :o) She was so nervous, but it is doing well. She is in 2 honors classes so she has been very busy!!
I am officially back to work and I am enjoying that "normal" as it keeps me going and my brain busy in the right direction. I was working M/W/F and then working from home Tues/Thurs., but I recently changed that and am now working half days in the office on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The Hubs and I didn't agree at first because I had that flexibility to work from hom, but it was something that I needed to do for myself. I knew that my mind would just not be in the right place and I would just think about not having the baby and was afraid I'd become more depressed. Plus, the boys are in preschool while I'm working so it's not that I am just putting them somewhere while I go to work. So far, it's been working out nicely.
Time is definitely making things easier, but my heart is still just so crushed. I have been seeing a counselor since losing Jaxton and that has been helping a lot. She definitely is helping me go through and deal with my emotions and reassuring me that I am not crazy and my feelings are normal. I am trying to be very aware of how my behavior is and what triggers certain moods/behavior as I really don't want my kids to not enjoy their mom and know that mom is going to make it out ok.
I see her about every week and half to two weeks and when I need. It's actually one of the greatest things that I could have done for myself and my family. I am very grateful for her. And I'm sure the rest of family is too --- I do wish that some days, I could just put her in my pocket so when I'm having a moment, I can just pull her out and she can tell me I'm ok and normal and tell the hubs or whomever is around me at that moment too --- just a reassurance to everyone that I am not crazy! Ha :o)
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